Why do men lie?

My friend has been dating this really nice guy but harbours a peculiar grouse against him. She claims he is lying when he says he loves her.

And her logic for his blatant lie: He wants to seduce her.

To which another friend had an observation: “If he has to say he loves you to get sex, his seduction capabilities leave much to be desired”. Frankly, I could not figure out whether this was to compliment my friend or insult the boy friend (maybe both).

Source

She ended up with: “To profess love to get sex is disgusting”.

Now on this sentiment, I am completely in sync. But don't we all lie, even if we don't profess love?

Right now, George Soros drives home the point that men say many things when dating, not all of which are true.

Soros is the most famous hedge fund manager in the world, not to mention probably the richest (ranked 30 on the Forbes Billionaire list with an estimated wealth of $19.2 billion). The octogenarian finds himself in the news either for his currency bets, his philanthropic ways (in 2010 he donated $100 million to Human Rights Watch) or his sexual dalliances.

Source: NY Post

When Soros was 80, he was dating 27-year old Adriana Ferreyr and promised her an apartment in Manhattan which was worth around $2 million. One day, when lying in bed, she asked him about the apartment and he coolly told her that his “other girlfriend” Tamiko Bolton was living in it and very happy there. Soros obviously believed in hedging all his bets. And the fight began!

Ferreyr claimed that he slapped her and attempted to hit her with a lamp which completely traumatized her. She then filed a $50 million suit against him for reneging on his promise to buy her the house.

Soros filed a countersuit of defamation and assault stating that it was she who picked up the lamp to hit him and struck him on his (80-year old) forearm. After it crashed on the floor, she cut her foot on the shards of glass when she got out of bed.

Now in this quintessential 'he-said, she-said' saga, I am not pondering on which one of them is lying about the lamp. The point here is that Soros probably lied when he promised her the apartment (the crux of the lawsuit). His lawyer William Zabel saidit well: “If every promise to a girlfriend was an enforceable contract, I’d be in court every day”.

When I asked a colleague in Singapore if he believes that men lie for sex, his answer: “Of course men lie for sex and women lie for marriage”.

Basically, all of us liars. Isn't it true? Don't we all lie?

If not all the time, most of the time?

If not most of the time, some of the time?

If not some of the time, at least very occasionally?

But it’s not just love (or lust or sex) that brings out this side of us. 

Don’t bosses lie? I am not addressing you if you are having sex with your boss and he said he loves you :) :) :) 

Seriously, don’t tell me you have never ever heard such statements.......

“I truly want to see you successful”

What was meant: “Your job is to make me successful so you better grovel to get me there”.

 “Your raise is above average”

What was meant: “Your wounded puppy look is grating my nerves. Obviously I could not give you more; it would have been taken out of my raise.”

“I’m your friend”

What was meant: “I need you to be the office mole and inform me about all the office thievery, gossip and sexual exploits so that I can use the information to further my cause.”

“We are one big family”

What is NOT said: The family is full of dysfunctional upstarts who are either belittlers, slackers, finger pointers or conniving back stabbers. Technically, this may not qualify as a lie but the boss was certainly economical with the truth.

This is where I need to clear the air since all MY bosses read this blog.
This post is NOTabout them (really, am not lying!).

But, hey, let’s be fair. Are employees themselves not great liars?

If I continue to elaborate I could find myself in really hot water, so let’s move on to more neutral territory.

Amongst the merry band of liars, most politicians stand head and shoulders above all other mortals. This is no revelation; everybody and their dog knows that politicians lie. Latest has been David Cameron talking about the national debt. The Independent questioned whether he can qualify as a liar. Fraser Nelson of The Spectator called it "astonishingly dishonest". In fact, it forced Robert Chote, head of the Office of Budget & Responsibility, to write a public letter to UK's prime minister. And did Greece not admit to lying in 2009 on its borrowings and huge deficits forcing a multi-billion euro bailout? But the most honest statement came from Luxembourg PM Jean-Claude Juncker who quipped "when it becomes serious, you have to lie". 

Though he was referring to meetings being held by the Eurogroup, this quip could be valid for any issue - politics, business, relationships or love. 

While some are born liars or pathological liars, others are moulded into one. A study done last year showed that studying economics has the high propensity to turn you into a liar. The researchers designed an experiment on students that gave its subjects every conceivable incentive to lie, and none to tell the truth. Though a large portion of students lied from every field, economics and business students beat the competition.

Source

There is an even more racy side to economists. According to a survey done in the UK covering 100+ universities, students studying economics were found to be most promiscuous, measured as the number of sexual partners since starting university. In case you are interested, students studying theology were at the bottom (they have more spiritual matters on their mind) proceeded by the environmental science students (they are too busy trying to save Mother Earth).  

So if you are dating an economist, chances are that s/he is one promiscuous liar. Don’t easily fall for the “I love you” line. Ask for evidence (the apartment in your name is adequate proof of love). Oh by the way, Soros has publicly expressed his desire to marry Bolton who actually did get the apartment.